Do you ever feel like an imposter? Like someone else would be better suited to live your life? Like God accidentally drew the wrong name and it turns out you aren’t qualified enough, or smart enough, or strong enough or beautiful enough to do what He thought you could do originally? I tend to feel this way more than I’d like to admit. I’m thirty eight, shouldn’t I feel confident by now? Shouldn’t I know how to live this life and trust God by now?
I’ve even found myself telling God, surely, someone else would do a better job. I don’t know if I can handle this responsibility. This weight seems too heavy for me. God, you should send someone else because I can’t do this.
This reminds me of a man in the Bible named Moses, who said these same things. When God told him to lead the people of Israel out of Egyptian slavery, He promised Moses that He would be with him and help him. It’s a huge deal when the God who created the universe speaks to you and says that He’s got your back. But instead of accepting the task with eagerness and gratitude, Moses hesitated. He began to list a litany of excuses, starting with, “Who am I that I should do this?“ (Exodus 3:11, my paraphrase).
God wasn’t upset by Moses’ reluctance. In fact, He responded by encouraging the guy. “Don’t worry, Moses. I got you. Everything is going to work out just fine. You’ve got this because I’ve got this!” (v. 12, my paraphrase). Boom, done! Or at least it should’ve been done. But Moses continued on with his excuses.
God is so patient. He kept seeing past Moses’ insecurity.
I’d like to think if I were Moses, as unqualified as I feel at times, I’d have said, “Okay, fine, God. You’re right, I know You’re with me, I’m in!” But that’s easy to say and when you’re in the moment, not as easy to do. After all, I imagine leading a nation of roughly two million people out of slavery wouldn’t be the easiest thing in the world to do. It’s a massive assignment.
Moses looked up at God and sighed. Then, nervously kicking the dust with his worn-out sandal, he said, “Sorry, God. You’ll just need to send someone else.” (v. 13, my paraphrase).
This was where Moses went wrong and where God got mad. The Bible says His anger burned against Moses. Cringe. Bible commentator, and our friend, Pastor David Guzik, makes a great point about this exchange:
“God was not angry when Moses asked, ‘Who am I?’ (Exodus 3:11). God was angry when Moses was just plain unwilling. There may be a hundred understandable reasons why Moses was unwilling, some of them making a lot of sense. Nevertheless, the basic truth was that Moses was unwilling, not unable.”
This hit me hard.
God can work with our insecurity. He can handle our weakness and feelings of inadequacy. But He can’t work with someone who is unwilling to trust and obey Him. He can’t work with someone who isn’t willing to put their head down and do the hard work even when it feels unnatural and impossible.
You don’t have to listen to the nagging voice in your head that says you don’t deserve a place on the team at your church because of the things you’ve done. The voice that says you can’t be a leader because you aren’t old enough or wise enough. The voice that says you can’t show
up and work hard because you aren’t qualified. You can wake up in the morning, you can show up to work in the week, you can show up to church on the weekend and say, “God, I’m reporting for duty.” I love that.
I was reading recently about Kim Kardashian. This article was talking about how she is working to become a lawyer. In this article, she referenced Abraham Lincoln when he said, “If you are resolutely determined to make a lawyer out of yourself, the thing is more than half done already. Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other thing.” It’s so true. You’ve got to decide, and no one else can make that decision for you. You’ve got to decide what voice you are going to listen to. The voice that says, “You’re too old for that dream, you’re too young for that calling, you’re too weak to walk that road,” or the voice of God that says, “I’ve called you to this, you’ve got this!”
Isn’t the mentality of Moses so much easier to choose than that of Abraham Lincoln? How often do we find ourselves wanting to run in the opposite direction or hide in bed, under the covers? For me, the idea that unwillingness is actually disobedience changes everything. Whether or not I feel worthy or qualified or able, I want to say yes to God. I want to be in such a place of trusting Him that I am willing to do what He has asked me to do, whether it makes sense to me or not.
I pray the same thing for you. That in the middle of how you might feel, that you would remember that all God is looking for is a willing heart. He doesn’t need you to have it all together, He just wants you to join Him and remember that He has it all together. If God’s got a job for us, He is going to give us the strength to do it, even if we feel we can’t.
You’ve got what it takes! God doesn’t tell us to feel strong and courageous, He tells us to be strong and courageous! This is a game changer. We often don’t feel strong or worthy or qualified, so we sit back and wait for those feelings to come before we step out in faith and obey God. But God doesn’t call us to feel strong; He calls us to be strong. Choose to be strong. Choose to walk in God’s strength. Choose to be obedient. And then, you’ll be able to say “yes God, here am I.”
Jennie Lusko serves alongside her husband, Levi, leading Fresh Life Church in Montana, Utah, Oregon, and Wyoming. They have five incredible children: Alivia, Daisy, Clover, Lennox, and Lenya, who is in heaven. The Luskos live in Montana, which boasts the largest snowflake ever recorded in history, one and a half times larger than a competition frisbee. One of Jennie’s greatest joys and calling is sharing the hope and freedom found in Jesus to those stranded in sin. She feels most alive when she’s helping people and giving gifts.