Do we have to?” I grumbled. My husband, Colin, gave me a patient We’ve-already-been-through-this look and replied, “Yes. We need it.” We had just started attending a new church and were on our way to our first life group get-together. Colin thought we should go to meet other couples. I thought a root canal sounded more fun than a dinner party with strangers who probably all had kids.
Infertility can complicate our relationship with church, causing us to feel disconnected and also making us want to disconnect. We might think we don’t belong in such a traditional, family-centric environment. Sunday services expose us to moms patting their baby bumps and fathers shushing their children––sights and sounds our hearts ache to experience. So to avoid the shame, awkwardness, and pain, we opt out.
But as believers church is vital to our well-being. Paul called the church the body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:27). God designed us to function best when we live interdependently with other Christians. We build each other up (1 Thessalonians 5:11), worship and pray together (Acts 2:42), and bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2). Imagine a nose trying to breathe on its own. Neither can we thrive without our fellow Christians.
Colin was right—we needed church community. Despite my reluctance, that life-group dinner introduced us to people who became dear friends and faithful supporters through our infertility journey. Though it’s hard when we’re hurting, we need to stay connected with church. We can find strength beyond our means in the body of Christ.
A Prayer for You
Lord, You hold me together even as my dreams crumble. I know church is Your idea, yet I sometimes struggle feeling at home there. Help me believe that You designed the body of Christ for my good. Give me courage to pursue connection at church so I can grow closer to You. Thank You for making me part of your Spirit-powered support network.